Missing my Dad...

I'm officially changing back to this blog and leaving my travel blog for travelling. This may not be a good day to start blogging since it isn't my favorite day in the world- but it is a day in my life that I have to get through like it or not. Today marks the one year anniversary of my dad being gone. I can't believe that it has been a year and I can't believe it has ONLY been a year. It feels like years since my dad and I drank coffee or since I have felt one of his tight hugs or a kiss on the cheek.

I'm sitting at the Willamette Coffee House- where my dad and I always came to have coffee. I came here to be closer to him- but mostly I've been sitting here crying. Imagine that?! We always walked in and he always said "I will have what she is having"- it was not the coffee he normally drank- but he knew it would be sweeter than anything he normally would have ordered- and he enjoyed that. He always wanted to sit outside and I wanted to sit inside. I sat inside today, but wished I had to have the debate of where to sit. We would sit here and talk about the garden, his business, our family, my life and any other topics that would come up. There are so many questions I wish I would have asked- stories I wish he could retell. I would promise to listen closer to the details this time. I always tried to listen- but when you have 'life' going on and you don't realize how quickly it can change- your mind wanders and now I wish I could go back.

It is strange how life has moved on and will continue to do so. It is strange that we have to have Christmas without my dad again. He would have been so excited to share in the joys of Kristin's pregnancy. He would have been excited to be a Grandpa and would have been so excited to join in on the 'big dreams' that Grant and Gabe have for the new baby- places he will camp, fish and all the great things they will teach him.

I miss him- and today I celebrate my favorite dad in the world. The guy that worked so hard to help make our family what it is today, the guy that made up songs about anything and the guy that had the most infectious laugh I know.